It’s pretty weird dating these days. You want to present yourself as approachable, but not desperate; like you have your life together (but not in a too-driven way); like you have relatable interests (without coming across too basic); and of course, sexy – but not in an ‘easy’ way. Yes, people have always had these problems, but this is the first time we’ve had to navigate the situation with only the help of a few photos and a brief introduction. It’s a hard balance to navigate, and as anyone who has ever downloaded a dating app knows, it is one that people get wrong all the time.
So, from the perspective of a female, here’s some advice on what to NOT do:
1) Don’t have the first picture be of you and your mates – nobody has time to scroll to the next picture to attempt to figure out who you are.
2) Don’t go on a bitter rant about what you don’t want (ie, ‘No time wasters, no girls with duck pics, if you look worse than your pictures you are buying drinks). There’s lots of time for her to figure out your worst qualities, don’t lay all the cards on the table from the get go!
3) Don’t take a picture of your abs in the bathroom. Please.
4) Don’t say that your interests are travelling and drinking. Everyone likes travelling and drinking – it just makes you seem uninspired and boring.
5) Don’t include photos of you working out at the gym.
6) Don’t only have photos of you in a suit with your lads.
7) Don’t include photos of you and your ex-girlfriend.
And here’s some stuff that DOES actually work:
1) Show you have a sense of humour.
2) Have some casual photos that show you have a normal, functional life with friends and interests.
3) Have a picture that can inspire some conversation – you need to have something to talk about initially.
4) Mention what you’re looking for if you know (it comes across as honest, and weeds out the people who aren’t on the same page without wasting time).
5) Do write a bio (albeit a short one).
6) Get a close girl friend to check your profile and give you feedback
Now that you’re ready, get to work. It’s summer, and there’s plenty of time to get some casual photos of you chilling in a park!