We know that some level of commitment is necessary for lasting relationships. But the word “commitment” means different things to different people. Some of us think of commitment as our wings – setting us free from worry and loneliness. But to others, it feels like a straightjacket that only restricts and confines us. But is it worth it?
A recent study from Harvard said, “happiness and health aren’t a result of wealth, fame or working hard, but come instead from our relationships.” Mentalhealth.org says “Being in a stable relationship is linked to both physical and mental health benefits.” The more secure you feel in your relationships with the people around you, the more likely you are to feel happy. No wonder commitment is a big deal – we all want to be happy.
Feel like commitment is a straightjacket? You might find you have to give up some of your individual interests or hobbies and learn to share space to find your balance in the relationship. This can be overwhelming, especially if you have little space to begin with. But if the above studies are true, it might be worth the sacrifice.
Relationships take two people. It should never be all compromises on one side, and it definitely shouldn’t have to be a constant handover of control. If the other person cares about you too, they will consider your choices and make their own compromises. Mentalhealth.org also says it’s important to understand that “while being in a relationship can have positive benefits for health, it is important to recognise that unhappy relationships are more destructive than being single.” Being committed alone isn’t enough to give your relationship wings. But relationships built on solid foundations will fly if both parties are committed to making it work.
Sure, it may mean putting somebody else’s feelings above your own. It may mean taking a backseat from time to time. When you’re thinking about more than you, sometimes your freedom to choose is clipped. But being with someone 100% invested – that sounds like a win. Worth it? We think so.